 |
|
||
|
|
||
 Care
Partner Feature Story
page 4 Your Life & Their Recovery by Max Szadek I really feel a care partner's expectations can create pressure for the survivor even if those expectations are never vocalized. The demands of the outside world are always going to be there and at some point you have to just let it go. Luther wasn't able to celebrate his birthday with us last year but he was able to this year and that's all right with me. Just saying, "It's my life but his recovery," also puts the focus back on me and the things I can control in my life -- not his. Making peace with my control issues has been no easy task but pursuing my own fitness program and playing tennis has allowed me to at least try. Once I chose to center my expectations around my own body's conditioning things got easier for me. Tennis has been a tremendous help for me as well because it's the one thing I can do that takes me out of my life and puts me in the moment. When I play a game of tennis, I'm thinking of hitting the ball and not about where Luther is or is not in his recovery. Care partners must have hobbies and activities outside watching TV to help them adjust to the demands of being a care partner. I think it was right around the fourth month that I began to understand that no matter what I experienced or what Luther was capable of doing, I had to let it go and come back the next day forgetting everything I saw or heard. I learned to let every day be a 'fresh start' and that's really been the secret for me.
 |
 |
 |
 |
